Attention, attention!
Hello! How are you? This is a friendly announcement to let all of my readers know that it is hot as balls outside. That’s right.
How hot is it outside? It’s motherfuckin’ Snakes on a Plane hot! Now why’d you even ask?
I had an idea this morning for staying cool. I’m going to try stripping naked and strapping one of those blue icepacks to my crotchal area. Then I’ll wrap myself in a “moisture wicking” loincloth fashioned from an overpriced Under Armour t-shirt. Summer, how you like me now, biaatch?
p.s.
I really want to wipe the smile off that motherfucking sun.
July 31st, 2006 at 4:34 pm
Try going around on a motorcycle, in full riding gear.
Just a note to all you Chicago-ans on the Kennedy this evening, if you see a guy dressed in full gear, on a big bmw off-road bike remember on thing:
I’m naked under there, really, seriously.
August 1st, 2006 at 5:25 am
You know what I do to beat the heat?
Ironically, I go outside and take a long walk.
Then the heat won’t seem so much like the sun’s fault.