Tim McCarver sucks
Oh, but I forgot the worst thing about the New York-Boston series: Tim McCarver is calling the games. This guy is a complete and utter douchebag. In a way few fellow broadcasters can match, the man is mute-worthy.
Luckily, I’m not alone in my assessment of him:
- The I Hate Tim McCarver Home Page, including “Ruminations on a Baboon”
- An amusing “Tim McCarver Sucks” graphic
- Laughable quotes by the Baboon, including:
- “Batters have a hard time hitting knuckleballs, catchers have a hard time catching knuckleballs and batters have a hard time bunting Rivera.”
- “I got my “splitter” and my “plate” mixed up and kind of called it a “splate.” It’s a new word I made up.”
However, neither of those quotes can match up to a gem I remember from my younger days when McCarver was calling a Braves World Series. I think it was against the Indians, and Marquis Grissom was up to bat:
“Marquis Grissom was born the 14th of 15th children. He bats second in the Braves lineup, a spot known as the table setter. That’s ironic because I’m sure he was setting the table quite a bit as a child.”
Hey man, I can’t make this stuff up. Now, I’m only left wondering who’s worse: Tim McCarver, or Bill Walton?
UPDATE 11/30/04: You can go cast a vote at AmIAnnoying.com about McCarver. Obviously he’s annoying; this is scientific fact. Yet inexplicably, 30-40% of voters find him not annoying. Remedy this by voting.
BETTER UPDATE: ShutUpTimMcCarver.com is the best resource for Tim McCarver on the net. They think he’s an awful announcer.
October 12th, 2007 at 6:21 pm
My family and friends are big baseball fans but it is unfortunate that we are subjected to Tim Mccarvers commentary. List of stupid things he says is much to long. PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE retire. IF he doesn’t voluntary retire, the network should retire him. I don’t know “anyhone” that likes him.
Why hasn’t the network figured this out.
October 12th, 2007 at 9:55 pm
PEASE!! Can’t someone get this big mouth douchebag to shut up? Can’t FOX see that everyone can’t stand this pathetic excuse for a broadcaster, and get rid of him. One of the tools(Joe Buck) is gone, so now it’s time for the other one to go.
October 12th, 2007 at 11:44 pm
OK, McCarver, we get it. It’s really, REALLY hard to catch a ball when it’s thrown to you by somebody standing 60 feet away!! Never mind that kids can manage that incredible feat on the elementary school playground. You want to try hard, try catching a ball hit by somebody 350 feet away, who’s NOT trying to hit it right at you, and deal with the wind, lights, noise, etc., while you’re doing it. But we’ll never hear about a great catch by an outfielder from you, will we, Tim?? Meanwhile, some catcher manages to avoid getting whacked in the nutsack even once, and you’re ready to have his mitt bronzed!!! Arrgghhhh!!!
October 13th, 2007 at 11:31 pm
And can you believe this moron had the balls to write a book called “Baseball for Brain Surgeons”? How ironic is that? It’s like Manny Ramirez writing a book called “Quantum Mechanics for Nuclear Physicists.”
October 20th, 2007 at 6:49 pm
I actually heard this hair-dyeing, low brow moron identify a batter–I cannot remeber who it was–as a “Bad Ball Swinger”. McCarver is the squarest most long winded announcer I have ever suffered through. His midwestern accent exacerbates his commentary as well–I intend, morever, no disrespect to the Midwest. I do not think much of Joe Buck either. It is obvious, therefore, that baseball fans are uninteresting, dull middle aged men who only like to buy Chevrolets because that is the type of person that Fox is selling to and, apparently, McCarver is still selling us.
Baseball will never be hip with McCarver as the pitchman.
October 21st, 2007 at 4:57 pm
Listening to McCarver makes me want to cut off both my ears.
October 23rd, 2007 at 9:48 am
I’m SO happy to see how much other people HATE THIS GUY!! Hey Tim ” The Red Sox won the Penant, you Asshole!” Can you stop whining about them now? Thanks…Oh and one more thing…”Shut UP!! Hey FOX…you suck for having him too. I wish Jerry Remy and Don Orsilio called all the post-season games.
October 26th, 2007 at 11:21 am
Look at Fox’s reply to an email, I blocked out the name because i didn’t get her permission even though I know she won’t mind:
Lou D’Ermilio [mailto:Lou.D'Ermilio@fox.com]
Sent: Wednesday, October 24, 2007 7:42 PM
To: —–, Barbara
Subject: RE: Baseball on FOX
Dear Ms. —–:
Obviously, we strongly disagree with your opinion of Tim’s work. We think he the absolute best at what he does, something that is best evidenced by his uncanny ability to first-guess game action.
I’m sorry you don’t care for Tim’s skills, but he is an Emmy Award winner, and is considered by most critics to be one of the best in the business.
I sincerely hope you enjoy the World Series. There are more than 150 people on our crew here in Boston working to capture all the sights and sounds for folks like yourself. It should be a great series.
Best,
Lou
This was the email that was sent to “Lou”
Lou D’Ermilio
Sr. Vice-President, Communications
Fox Sports
Dear Sir:
Why does Fox allow Tim McCarver to continue broadcasting these important games? He is absolutely the most offensive, inaccurate, and irritating announcer in the history of broadcasting. We had to listen to his stupid and irrelevant comments during the 1995 World Series, when he was so flagrantly biased against the Braves. It became so bad, we muted out the sound for much of the game. Now, we are going through it again!
He has the uncanny ability to lament endlessly about some minor point that nobody cares about anyway. A player makes an error. Five innings later, McCarver is still droning on and on about what the score might be if that player had not made that error back in the first inning. He can’t remember the players’ names (Manny Rodrigues, etc.), he gives the wrong information all during the game “Westbrook has struck out 10”, when Westbrook had struck out six.
He can’t be considered a good announcer, by any stretch of the imagination, so why does the world have to suffer like this? If Fox wants to turn people against baseball, I don’t know of any way to do it faster or more thoroughly.
Do you actually WATCH AND LISTEN to these games? If so, this can’t be news to you.
Barbara
October 27th, 2007 at 11:10 pm
Irritated as always by McCarver this evening and thought I’d see if there were any sites related to him, and lo and behold, I am not alone in my feelings. Tim strikes me as someone who loves to hear himself talk. One easily senses how hard he is trying to be clever. Often states the obvious and rarely adds insight. Sad.
November 17th, 2007 at 7:45 pm
I like Tim McCarver. As a long time listener to baseball games, I find Tim speaks to me.
March 9th, 2008 at 8:33 am
If you really think Tim McCarver is that bad, you’ve obviously never been “regaled” by Ralph Kiner’s malapropisms. To be sure, he was a great home-run hitter with the perennial basement-dwelling Pirates of the 1950s and from what I gather quite a nice guy. But an announcer? I grew up in the era of Mel Allen, Red Barber, Vin Scully, Chuck Thompson, Bob Prince, Jack Buck, Jack Brickhouse, Harry Caray, Ernie Harwell, Curt Gowdy, et al.
And while we’re at it, bring back daylight World Series games (it just doesn’t feel like the WS at night when you can see the players’ breath) and also the old custom of alternating home team announcers, not these netwok shills.
April 7th, 2008 at 3:49 pm
hey timmy ! Do you recall in the year of
1967 when you tapped the second string
catcher John Honey Romano and told him
that the front office wanted to talk to him
His response was don’t ever tap me on the
shoulder again..We know the outcome!
brown nose for sure…Your a yankee
hater and joe buck is in a fog..Your a kiss
of death and a jerk off .
Jackie turso
give honey a call
June 28th, 2008 at 6:19 pm
I like Tim McCarver, I think he’s a good announcer. I’m 26.
July 2nd, 2008 at 3:00 am
I’m sorry, I think Tim McCarver is virtually the finest color man and hip orator in the business. I enjoy his hockey and football broadcasts, performed during a baseball game. I don’t think he knows it. Sally sprays his hair with that back of the head hair shit in case the camera catches him giving Buck a hummer during the break. His ability to be Captain Fucking Obvious make the rest of us look like Harvard Grads. “Coming up to bat is Derek Jeter. Derek bats right handed which means that he bats from the right side. Now, if he was left handed..er..what…ah OK”. Joe Buck reels him in under his breath “Tim, shut the fuck up!” I was actually on a plane to Lou’s glory. USA Today had Buck and McCarver as the best baseball announcers. USA Today has never seen a dime of my money since. Fucking jerkoffs. Now how many people actually listen to these fucks. Playoffs, may have to, WS, possibly. Does anyone watch this shit at home for any other reason that the fucking game starts @ 10 EST and we are too toasted to drive. To the guy above. Day games. Yeah, that would be great, but MLB just wants to aileniate another generation so they can’t figure out why kids don’t like baseball and they can’t figure out why the numbers are down to the NFL. A billion don’t hurt either. FUX gives a cool Billion or so, just so we get Mc’s incite on how much chalk they use. Ratings are down cause fucking games start @ 9PM and get over at 2
AM, Budster, unless it’s an All Star game and we just make it a tie since we have no pitchers. Hey Bud, why don’t you don a uniform and pitch. Based on that spit bucket under your chin, Gaylord Perry would have nothing on you. So for us Non-Harvard Grads, let’s break this down.
1) Ask a 12 year old how many playoff/WS games he saw. 3 innings, maybe. Radio in your room to listen? “What are you talking about”
2) The presentation. Hey Tim, I just asked you what time it is. I didn’t want to know how to make a watch.
3) The time of game. Enough said
4) The roid years. Hey Bud, I have a clear solution to that problem (yes I do).
5) The roid years. How many kids hero’s let them down. Bud, hows that plan you and Ferh and Congress produced. Buds plan. No testing.
6) Bud, are you like the worst Commissioner ever? ‘94 WS gone. Blind eye to roids, as home runs brought this fine game back. As you sit in your office, is your favorite toy the slinky, silly putty or Lincoln Logs “hold all calls”.
7) My last and favorite. Since it is all about money, I have the MLB package. It is good Sunday to Friday. It isn’t good SaturDAY. Why, because FUX has all rights to day games. Could be Royals and Angels (no dis). Game could start at 3:30 PM EST. Hey Bud, What time do most games start? Before then. Sorry, MLB has blacked these out. All of them. 6-8 of them. Why, cause FUX has the rights to fuck up EVERYONES DAY for something we paid for. Just so Tim McCarver can be gainfully employed one more week. I’d love to hire that mother fucker, just so I could fire him. Throw Bud on this list. (Bud, even Nixon had the brains to quit, you low fore headed nose picker.) I love two-fers. Sorry about the long dissertation. I have a list of rants if anyone cares.TW
July 29th, 2008 at 11:29 pm
We had the unfortunate situation to have Buckethead, Tim McCarver, as our home team (Giants) announcer during 2002. When I heard him the first time I groaned, “Not this stupid idiot, he has no idea what is going on out on the field.” My wife corrected me and said “Now, we have to give him a chance.” I replied “This bonehead has been making nonsense for years, just wait and he will for sure blabber about nothing.” Sure enough the blah blah blah came through with a witticism like “They can either pitch to him or walk him.” My reply to the TV was “No Tim, they can hit him, maybe they can all go to the movies, or just forfeit on the spot. WTF?” Needless to say after he scribbled on the teleprompter and lost his train of thought, even my ten year old said “What is up with this guy?” Then the Giants play the Angels in the world series and Tim does all he can to knock down the team that paid most of his salary that year. What about a bone dude. Jon Miller does that for us once in a while, but he is a professional, not a buckethead hack. Someone should shut this guy up. He is an embarrassment to the baseball community, kinda like the TBS homers. (Home run call from those bozos “Is it fair or is it foul” No other words, just watching the player run the bases and we had to assume it was a home run.
August 8th, 2008 at 11:28 pm
Tim had a real gem on a Yankee game a couple weeks ago. Maybe it was the Allstar game. “I think, the reason pitchers don’t throw to the big part of the plate is so that batters can’t use the big part of the bat”. Holy shit, let’s get the lord’s of baseball knowledge together and make a new entry. This guy is a hack and needs to be run off TV. I will boycott all advertisers on FUX TV from here out. Sad thing is he sucked as a catcher but will make the HOF as a blabbing head. One can only hope he is dead when/if that happens. One less useless speech. Think of the baseball announcer greats. Tony Kubek, Curt Gowdy, Joe Garrarziola?, the guy from TWIB, Bob Ueker, etc. Pros. Get some tapes McCrapper. Learn to show some value and shut the fuck up sometimes, instead of insulting America’s intelligence. Lose the tele-prompter. I don’t care that Derek Jeter hits .375 on Tuesdays when it is 80-90 degrees on night games with 3 lights out in right field. We are all pissing up a rope you know. He don’t give a shit. FUX don’t give a shit. FUX don’t know what we know. Mute and boycott. Let’s all send an email to FUX sports. Boycott. Imagine the startup station with Married with Children and In Living Color are pissing us off so bad. I miss the original IHATETIMMCCARVER.com web site. He had to buy it out. So graphic. Guess he couldn’t handle references to him giving his mom the old poop chute ride. It was great. Funny thing, to prove his idiocy, he didn’t learn. Well Timbo, get ready, cause here it comes again, 1000 fold. I got a whole platoon of Marines that will take care of you. Try 20,000, twenty PC’s to type and free beer.
August 9th, 2008 at 10:20 pm
I can not stand to listen to him. All he seems to want to talk about is how much money the players are making! If I wanted to watch money, I would watch people banking. I tune to a ball game to see and hear baseball! I don’t need to be reminded how much money I missed out on when a drunk driver smashed into my car and ended my baseball career one week before it started!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:49 pm
The problem is the people that make decisions at big networks like FOX don’t care about commentating, they care about ratings. So if FOX smartly picks up the most popular games, they are going to continue to get good ratings and continue to use the ridiculously incompetent Tim McCarver. You can complain all you want, but the only way anything will change is if the ratings go down.
October 13th, 2008 at 10:16 pm
Okay, I just thought I would see if Im the only one that thought tim McCarver was a old jerk.Nope,Nope,Nope, looks like theres an entire army against this puke. I remember him back when he got into it with Neon Deon Sanders, now the comments about Manny, who knows who else Ive missed. Cann that old prune, spit out the seed, and leave it there too rot.
October 27th, 2008 at 8:39 pm
I believe Tim McCarver AND Joe Buck Jr should be relieved of their duties of droning on about every game they call. I’m watching game 5 of the World Series and heard them bragging that they have been together for 13 years. Most of the World Series I watch without the sound turned up - it’s just easier than hearing their voices or “well Joe, when I played”…please!
October 27th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
Apparently, I am not alone in my distain for McCarver. I was listening to him belch up his usual, rediculously common-sense observations and semi-retarded metaphors and decided to search the web with “Tim McCarver is an idiot” and landed on this page. That should be sufficient for most, but I need to vent a little bit more. Fox needs to get rid of both Buck Jr. and “Captain Obvious”. I wouldn’t wish an audio tape of these two dummies on a death row inmate. Lifeless, mindless, suicide-inducing banter. Break out the razor blades and warm up the bath tub. End of rant.
October 27th, 2008 at 9:09 pm
OMG - I can not stand listening to him. I’m a Phillies fan and it seems he is completely negative against the Phillies. The World Series he has done nothing but talk about Tampa Bay and talk negative about the Phillies. When I can I turn off the sound on Fox and turn on the radio.
October 30th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
If I didn’t know better I would say that the Phillies must of screwed him out of playing in the 1980’s World Series over Bob Boon who had two bad knees and stilled kick ass. I mean is the guy holding a grudge all these years or does he just simply hate Philly Fans? Someone tell the jerkoff he supposed to be one of us.
Tim had something negative to say about the Phillies at least 20 times throughout the Dodgers & Rays series.
You know that play in Game 3 where Jimmy Rollins was tagged out at third but called safe. McCarver cried about 5 times how bad the call was but not once did he stick up for us on the 5 bad calls that went the Rays way. He even replayed it again the next day and again started crying. He zoomed in on Jimmy’s ass and pointed out that the glove was shoved 3 inches up his ass and Jimmy liked it.
I can only hope that both McCarver and Morgan get fired from broadcasting.
Joe Morgan, another grumpy old bastard who badmouths the Philly Fan. While I’m complaining it would have been nice to hear Kruk throw some props our way on the ESPN Show. Only Mitch Williams (one time most hated player by the Philly Fan) had nice things to say about us over and over again. Thanks Mitch you’re a class act who didn’t deserve the abuse we through your way.
PSS
Howard Eskin you were wrong about the Phillies, Sixers and Eagles 3 years straight! Also please stop moonlighting as the Burger King Man and for gods sakes stop hitting on young hot girls, it’s creeping everyone out!
Congrats Phillies, know one can take this away from you not even Tim “I got benched in the 1980 World Series” McCrybaby.