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Tribal tattoos are retarded

So you wanted a tattoo. You were psyched. You needed some design, some message, written in ink on your body for life. The skin God gave you was too plain. You were itchin’ to redecorate. You were ready for a change. And you did it, baby.

So why the hell did you pick a tribal tattoo? What is the glamour in having to explain its meaning to every chick who’s ditzy enough to ask you about it?

“Oh, this is based on a ancient pattern favored by the Hittites. It’s very unique.”

So? It still sucks. Let me tell you something: We don’t have tribes in America, so I can guarantee that the design has no intrinsic meaning to you apart from its “non-American-ness.” If that’s what you’re into, why don’t you just let the fucking tattoo artist doodle on your arm? It would make as much sense as what you’ve got on there now.

And one more thing. For those of you with words tattooed on your body in Chinese and Russian and Phoenician and Greek characters: What exactly were you trying to accomplish there, champ?

“This is the Chinese symbol for strength. Isn’t it cool?”

No, ass wad, the English word for “strength” (which, by the way, is “strength”) would have worked just grrrreat.

190 Responses to “Tribal tattoos are retarded”

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  1. 181
    Biggest Arms In The World Says:

    This jason character is small and useless. I’m the real deal.

  2. 182
    Gregory Albert Govin Says:

    Hey post (180) why don’t you go fuck yourself! I’ll agree, the tribes are all around us, they’re called casinos, and all they do is take money from the white trash. To make one thing perfectly clear, tribal tattoos don’t mean anything other than you think that you are cool and a complete waste of space. So why don’t YOU go FUCK YOURSELF!!! You stupid no toothed drunken longhair!

  3. 183
    Willard Says:

    Unolekoga, what does your name mean? That sound eskimoish. As for your growth in numbers… It would be easy for any one group to gain rapid population by sitting around on free government funding when all you have time for is drunken sex. Don’t make it sound like you are some noble group who’ll have a positive impact on society. The south isn’t going to rise again, blacks shall never “overcome”, and your people will never sober up long enough to make one goddamn difference in the world. Why don’t you just submit like your weak-minded fore-fathers did and quit hanging on to some false hope. Don’t worry, we’ll put a clause in the next treaty for extra whiskey and some dental care. You walrus blubber eating piece of shit. Ug!

  4. 184
    Roy Rodgers Says:

    I hate red-skinned forest whores!

  5. 185
    Albert Says:

    Hey Tonto! Why don’t you and your wagon burning friends shut your goddamn yap! Why don’t you open up another casino, that is unless you’re too busy trying to say that it’s still in your treaty rights to keep spearing walleye. If you want to keep to the treaty, three or more injuns is considered a war party, so that means I can start shooting. FUCK YOU!!!

  6. 186
    Jamal Washington Says:

    I be liken’ my tats. Got me one of Malcom X, and a bunch of other gorilla mess. Even though you can hardley see them through my crap-colored skin. I think dey da shiznite! Yo my red-skinned brotha, this Willard cat sound like a fool. Too bad we have the brain power of an ant or we could do something. Got any crack?

  7. 187
    Martin Luther King Says:

    Death to whitey!

  8. 188
    nativepride Says:

    OMFG!!!!i can’t belive you guys are talking about native americans that way…..thats so fucked up…i think anyone who is a racist should be ass fucked by everyone…but hey if it makes you feel like a man to call down natives then so be it…and i thought some of you guys were pretty damn cool…but then here comes the hate of natives….all i have to say is i’m a sioux indian and i’m proud of what i am…and nothing anyone says about natives can bother me….

  9. 189
    Chief Wampum Says:

    I must agree with you nativepride! I’m of the soix nation and am very proud of my heritage. But you must agree that this unolekoga character is a complete asshole. He makes himself sound like one of those “The South Will Rise Again” assholes. I personally find this shit funny,and part of the reason is I know it’s aimed toward this unolekoga fuck! I must say, that I might have to challenge you though native pride. I think that we should battle for tom sherman’s love.

  10. 190
    tom sherman Says:

    The comments here passed the ridiculousness threshold a long time ago! Gotta close it up, kids.

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